Let Me Brag on my GOD!

The hurt, the pain, the disappointment, the frustration . . .

The times my mouth said I TRUSTED when truthfully I did ANYTHING BUT . . .

The days I stayed in bed with no strength to do a single thing productive . . .

The anti-depressants . . . the suicidal thoughts . . . the belief I had nothing to live for . . .

The years of being unemployed without a job-lead . . . but even worse with NO HOPE . . .

The sexual addiction . . . the insatiable desire, and thirst, for porn . . . the love of the perverse . . . the days and nights I treated myself like nothing more than a WHORE . . .

The couple of nights I had the gun, a 38-special, in my hand completely isolated from anyone who loved me . . .

The not wanting to look myself in the mirror because of the losses I'd experienced, the decisions (mostly not in my right-hand, some just being HUMAN and ALL done out of selfishness) I had made and tireless pursuit of ALL things empty . . .

IT's ALL GONE! A DISTANT memory . . . a NEW creation . . . but the EFFECTS? Those are LASTING. See, losing my childhood best friend when he was 20, losing my little sister (16), my brother (22), my job after five years, my Papaw (who helped raise me), my savings account drained, an ill-advised marriage broken, having my heart broken by two women who swore they'd never leave me (and losing 10-15 pounds after both break-ups), crying what seemed like endless tears, because at times they were, ALL of it.

Wait! You didn't tell them about hour after hour looking at porn, of all types, you didn't tell them about all the beds you've crawled into, the webcam shows, the countless number of naughty pictures both sent and received, threesomes, membership on adult/XXX dating sites and websites, the random hotel rooms, treating good women like whores, Godly women you tried to corrupt, seeking out 'whores' for freebies and at the very lowest point even worse things than that.

I felt like I had lost so much I had NOTHING left. Some of you may be feeling like that now! That's LIE . . . straight from the pits of hell. No matter how much you've lost, God can, will and DOES RESTORE! (back to that in a moment). I was empty. I was broken. I was tormented. But what's worse than that?

Being empty, broken, tormented and filling that emptiness up with any and every thing you can think of-- I didn't sit back and wait for temptation to find me. I actively, relentlessly, tirelessly and unwaveringly sought it out as if my very life depended on it!

This is just a little bit of my testimony. These are the things I've endured. The things I've survived. The things God has used to mold and prepare me. . . for what I'll do, but what's more important to prepare me for who I'll be.

God does NOT say our ABUNDANT LIFE will be without trouble, but He does say He will be with us each step of the way ("Neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:39) and also Deuteronomy 31:6, "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave nor forsake you."

The THING we want you to know is YOU are ALREADY a masterpiece~ fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14), God's handiwork (Ephesians 2:10), before He formed you in your mother's womb He already knew you, before you born He set you apart (Jeremiah 1:5)~ that's what I want you to know! You just have to walk in it. I just have to walk in it. In other words, it's up to us to TAP INTO IT!! When you accept Jesus as your personal Savior, the same resurrection power that raises Lazarus, and more importantly, Jesus comes to dwell inside you.

It's a DECISION-- not only a year-by-year, month-by-month, week-by-week, day-by-day, hour-by-hour, minute-by-minute decision, but a moment-by-moment decision! That's all we have is this moment-- right here and right now . . . nothing more and nothing less.

Where I am now is some about my decision-making ability becoming better, but MORE about His unconditional Love, relentless mercy and ever-abounding Grace.

There is no more crying without ceasing, wailing in my anguish, feeling forgotten and forsaken. No more soaked pillows and not caring if I lived anymore or not. He saw me in my great sadness and lifted me out of it! He replaced my weeping with dancing!! In place of sorrow, He has given me joy! (Jeremiah 31:13)

God's broken the chains of pornography off my life. Sexual addiction no longer dictates my life though I fight it, sometimes successfully and sometimes not, moment-by-moment. I'm not just sleeping with random women in destructive pattern. I am committed to waiting until I am married to have sex. I want to do life His way instead of my own selfish way. I can only imagine how amazing our honeymoon will be knowing I let Jesus write my love story instead of forcing things, intimacy or the relationship in general. I don't deserve a Godly woman, a Proverbs 31 lady, based on the things I've done in my life, but that's another example of God's faithfulness and Grace that I WILL have that!

 I am employed. When I'm not working, I volunteer at Christian Ministry soup kitchen. What He's done and who He is are the reasons why I pour myself into my loving, amazing family and friends and strangers alike.

I appreciate differently. I hear people differently. I see people differently. I smile differently. I pray differently. I believe differently. I trust differently. I smile differently. I feel differently. I envision differently. I hurt differently. I endure differently. I encourage differently. I love differently.

Why? Because I am DIFFERENT and it's ALL because of Jesus.

Some people mistake when I mention me volunteering as me BRAGGING. Well guess what?! I am! I am bragging on God the GREAT (and that falls woefully short of describing Him) I AM!! I only share what 'I' am doing so I can brag on Him. Apart from Christ, I can DO NOTHING good! Not one single thing. Only He can take someone who was 'dead' and raise him back to LIFE! A miserable excuse of a human being into a compassionate man. . . I went from having a good heart with great intentions, but with NO motivation into a servant, which is what I strive for every single day!


Because He loves me, I LOVE-- it's just that simple.

Before I filled my cup with CRAP . . . AKA empty and harmful things . . . now, I try to let God fill it with things that give me life, share His Love and bring Him glory!

No, I don't always get it right. Yes, there are times I fall short, but I am a NEW creation (Therefore if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come. The OLD has gone, the NEW is here! 2nd Corinthians 5:17). I am DIFFERENT!

While I battle lust and sexual addiction daily, sometimes successfully, one thing I do get right is walking in humility, with each step filled (overflowing the cup) with gratitude for His Love. For Him Him dying for me, adopting me, for guiding me, protecting me, providing for me and for Him not giving up on me are the reasons I am different.

My friends, I know what it's like to have NOTHING. If you have nothing right now, whether it be materially (as far as not having any $$) or spiritually (you being very distant from God), I encourage you to fill your EMPTY cup with Him. If you fill it with anything else, it's just a chasing after the wind . . . a vain pursuit! How do I know? Because I've done it--- a million times over!

All the pain, all the emptiness, all the sin-- that which the Devil hoped would destroy me was turned around and used for God's unsurpassable Glory (Genesis 50:20) and that-- that is WHY I SMILE! That is why shrank my circle of friends, through realizing I used that term far too loosely, so the people I love the most, and are the closest to me, can get the best version of me not the leftovers version! That is why when I don't feel like doing something I do it! I am not married, don't have any kids and not where I want to be in terms of from a professional standpoint, in my career, but I do have something you can't put a value on JOY! Though my future self, if I was 18, would look at me as being incomplete if I was 35 and without all those things, I'm more COMPLETE than ever! I smile because my life bears much fruit and it's ALL BECAUSE OF HIM . . . ALL JESUS, none of me!!

JESUS infinity Me 0.

Hope springs ETERNAL and Hope's last name is Christ. No matter where you are. No matter where you've been. No matter what you've done . . . It's NOT TOO late to empty your cup and start over! That's what I want you to know!! Believe things are going to get better and then make decisions that reflect that faith, so that things DO GET BETTER!

I would love to tell you things get much EASIER, but the truth is that's not the case at all. But if you empty your cup and let God refill it, you will be more FULL than you've ever been. You will thirst NO MORE when your life, heart and mind are filled with the Living Water that is Jesus (John 4:13).

There is an END to your death, which we call depression! There is an end to your frustration! There is an end to your anger! There is an end to your confusion! There is an end to wanting more and to keeping up with the Jones's! There is an end to the thoughts, feelings and beliefs you're not good enough and there is NO purpose for your life! There is an end to the nagging, lingering and stinging sadness! The Light at the end of your tunnel will come and that's Light's name is Jesus!!

The needy, homeless and poor people at the soup kitchen have taught me this . . . they're NOT NEEDY at all! In fact, many of them are more rich than most rich people will EVER be! While many wealthy people forget where their blessings come from, act entitled and prideful, they are appreciative, grateful, honest about where they are and sincere beyond measure. When you have experienced having NOTHING, it's easy to appreciate ANY THING! I've learned this in so many ways and have always said no matter what my bank account says I will be rich in the things that matter.

I no longer am concerned about protecting my losses, my heinous sins, the times I was fake and served two masters or worse the Devil himself . . . I am concerned with protecting God's victory, what He's done, what He is doing and will do, but more importantly WHO HE IS!

I smile because I needed and need a Savior and He found me! I smile because while I'm not where and who I will be, I'm not where I was or who I've been . . . that gives me the strength to boldly walk whatever life may hold day in and day out with not a single step taken in MY strength. My confidence stems from God, the One who hung the stars and moon, carved the mountains, filled the creeks, rivers, lakes, seas and oceans, calls me His son, his friend, his servant. My confidence and great HOPE is found in Philippians 1:6, "He who began a good work in me will continue His work until it is finally finished." Until it is COMPLETE.

We are ALL works in progress. That is a fact . . . not to be mistaken for an excuse to live however we want, but a fact nonetheless and in that we should find great encouragement! KNOW everything works together for our good (Romans 8:28)-- that's how unfathomably awesome God is!! He is before our tragedy . . in our tragedy and after our tragedy! He uses our tragedies, heart breaks, disappointments and unspeakable pain to strengthen us, teach us, correct us and mold us. Trust in His plans for your life (Jeremiah 29:11) for they are FAR greater than we could ever dream up for ourselves! (Ephesians 3:20).

God broke the chains off my life! He is not just the Great Liberator-- He is Liberation! He is Hope for the Hopeless! He is not just the Life-Giver, He is Life . . . not just the Way-Maker, He is the Way . . . not just the Truth-Teller, He is the Truth . . . He is not just the determined Reconciler, He is Reconciliation. . . He is not just the Mender of ALL things broken, He is the glue! He might've allowed those tears, but He also caught every single one (Psalm 56:8) Whatever you need Him to be in your life, He will be-- that's why He calls Himself the 'I Am'

'I Am' your Daddy . . . even if your earthly father has failed you.

'I Am' your Savior. 'I Am' your Friend. 'I Am' your Brother. 'I Am' your Provider. 'I Am' your Protector. 'I Am' your Provider. 'I Am' your ______________. Fill in the blank. Whatever you need in your life right now, at this very moment, I PROMISE you He will be it and He is El Shaddai, which literally translates to, "More than enough breasts," so He won't only be it, but He will be MORE THAN ENOUGH in fulfilling that role in your life!

God not only has turned my heart of rock into a pool . . . He turned my hard heart into springs of Living Water. (Psalm 114:8).

That's why even through ALL the tragedies I've experienced, whether they be my own doing, life's circumstances or God's doing, it's easy to brag on my God! Won't you let Him do the same to yours?

Falling in Love with JESUS

Falling in Love with Jesus is the best thing I ever did

So ashamed of all the times I ran and all the times I hid

All you wanted to do was love me sweet Jesus in a way I’ve never known

You’ve always kept me afloat no matter how big the waves or how hard the winds have blown

Nothing too shattered, nothing too broken for the Father’s loving touch

You make beauty from ashes, oh You’re so much more than a crutch

You’re the air I breathe, the song I sing, the very reason why I live

Teach me how to share Your Love, to care and to forgive

I just want to see You exalted~ to see You high and lifted up

I know I’ve torn You down, but now I’m asking You to fill my cup

Let me be so clumsy that I spill it wherever I may go

Let them all feel Your Love may Your name be all they know

I’m down on my knees, as tears fall, God help me know You again

I want to fall into your Grace, cause lately all I’ve known is sin

But you catch me or help me up each time I’ve missed the mark

You allow me to burn again~ you start a fire from just a spark

To say You are good  . . . to me that’s closer to a lie

You allow me, with two broken wings, to still reach the sky

God I’m starting to get butterflies help me to fall head over heel

Everything in this world is fake, but God You’re ALWAYS REAL!

JMB

Who Gets the Glory!?!

Would you deliver my message if you had to do so anonymously? The question cuts to the heart of the matter without sugarcoating a single ounce!

Who was asking? None other than God Almighty Himself. When I asked Him why He was asking, He continued His teaching . . . because I care more about motives behind why you do something more than if you do it. Rhetorically, I asked in response, "Really?"

"If it were not so, would I have spoken it?"

Which brings me to one word-- one that's both a question and an answer-- GLORY! Who gets the glory? Do you want to receive the compliments, accolades and acclaim only for your 'fans,' or audience if you will, to look at you? Or do you want to get all the attention, so that when you have their attention, you can direct the glory back to the Gifter God!?!

God did not give ANY of us our gifts or talents to ONLY benefit ourselves. Our gifts, talents and lives are ALL from Him and for Him (James 1:17, Romans 11:36 and Col. 1:16). If I had to narrow our lives and purpose down to two things my answer would be a simple one-- to share His Love with everyone we come into contact with for His unsurpassable Glory!

Sure we are supposed to extend the same mercy, grace and forgiveness we've been extended and let people know there is hope and that's Hope's last name is Christ . . . but all that falls under the category of sharing His Love.

I only want to bring Him glory without my life-- plain and simple . . . nothing more and nothing less because I've definitely glorified ME, sex, lust, perversion and the Devil himself plenty! God relentlessly pursued me even when I was steadily running away from Him-- now that's LOVE!! Since He accepted me with open arms, after I had done nothing but accept counterfeit love, pursued and caught lies in a feeble attempt to satisfy and to find contentment, I feel compelled to use my talent to write for His Glory.

Do I do so out of GUILT, self-condemnation or trying to earn acceptance from God? Do I do so to try to prove to myself I am no longer that pitiful excuse of a man, who made a boatload of pitiful decisions, selfish, at best, destructive, in truth, I was for years? No . . . the TRUTH is He loves me, and each one of us, enough to send His Son Jesus to die on the cross for our sins. GRACE, which is freely given but came at the ultimate cost, covers every bad decision we will ever make throughout the course of our lifetimes. Even though we CHOSE to separate ourselves from Him, God still chose to love us enough to find a way back to Him.

Simply put, grace means there is no longer condemnation-- hear that-- NO condemnation! He did not give us gifts and talents so that the world would just look at us or so our bank accounts could get larger, cars get nicer and houses could get bigger . . . He gave them to us so that when the world looks at us, we could instantly point them to Him! There is nothing wrong with having nice things and earning them through utilizing our gifts and talents. But if the only people who benefit from your platform, and profession, are you and your inner circle then I believe that saddens God.

"To whom much is given, much is required." Luke 12:48 I believe what is required is gratitude, humility, a servant's heart and blessing those who are less fortunate and in need. It would be amazing to see how much of the world's hunger problem would go away if those who have would SHARE.  Do unto the least of these (Matthew 25:40) . . . is the command Jesus Himself gave us. But sadly the truth is MANY don't give a damn about the 'least of these' as long as they are good and have everything they want and need.

It's not my place to judge . . . after all, it's only been the past couple of years I've become less selfish enough to do unto those who have much less than I have! In fact, I believe most people couldn't really care less about growing closer to God as long as He keeps the conveyor belt of blessings down from Heaven to them a'rolling! Sad but TRUE.

As for me-- I don't want a single crumb that falls from Heaven if I can't have the One whose hands it falls from! I don't get it right. Rather, I should say I don't allow the Lord to get it right through me all the time, but one area I strive to get it right in is where I direct the glory for ANY good thing I do, which is back to my Source, my All in All (who I treat like Nothing at times), my Creator and my Savior. After all, hasn't He earned that?

While He's earned all of our fierce allegiances . . . He also has earned getting the recognition instead of pitiful, without Him ,insignificant me! I take 99% and deflect the glory to God and take ONE percent, for myself, to put in my sails to use it as inspiration and motivation to keep sailing along. But may my Earthly voyage come to an end if I ever take much more than that no matter if my words touch hundreds, thousands (like they do now) or millions.

I give You the glory God-- not because of what You've done, continue to do or will do . . . I give You the glory for WHO YOU ARE!! Sadly, many Christian entertainers, athletes, musicians and pastors are caught up in idolatry with the god being themselves. They either turn a blind eye to it, thus showing apathy, or the scales remain on their eyes and they don't even realize it. I refuse to EVER be one of them! If you ever hear about what 'I'm' doing more so than what the Lord is doing then I've become blinded as well. "I am the Lord; that is my name! I will not give my glory to another!!" Isaiah 42:8.

Athletes not one touchdown, not one point, not one home run impresses God if done only for YOU, but every single action that glorifies Jesus Christ pleases Him. The same goes for pastors. Not one single sermon meant to make your name blow up is seen as impressive in the eyes of the Almighty, but every single word uttered for His indescribable glory is! Musicians, singers and rappers, not one note sung, one tune played or one word rapped for yourself moves God's heart . . . but every single one with Him at the Center causes ALL of Heaven to break into thunderous applause!  As a writer, not one word written for the sake of notoriety is worthwhile, while every single letter written for the King brims with Life, Hope, Peace, Joy and Love! No matter whether you're a school teacher, a trash man, in sales or in the business world . . . this remains the same. What is done for SELF is EMPTY~ what is done for God will always be a pleasing aroma to the nostrils of the Creator. And what is done for Him will give you the GREATEST fulfillment! It's one of the biggest reasons we were created to bring Him glory!! What a POWERFUL thought!

The problem is MANY forget what God has done for them, so there is no kindness or humility . . . only selfishness and conceit. On Twitter, even sincere believers get caught up in the hierarchy of Blue Checkmarks vs. those who don't have one. Jesus would HARSHLY rebuke  your arrogance and feeling you are better than others. Only misplaced arrogance resides where meekness should be found. Gratitude has taken on the garments of the spirit of Mammon and the growing rationale is the person was somehow primarily responsible for their talent, their gift, their achievements and their platform. Unless you can put breath in your own lungs and unless you can give yourself your next heart beat not one of us is self-made only God-made no matter how big your entrepreneurial pursuits and successes.

Why do I take the subject of glory so serious? In the same way our words can bring about either destruction or life (Proverbs 18:21) so too can we rob people of life in their lives when we keep the glory for ourselves. Every day I live is another opportunity to tell people of God's AWESOMENESS! In all actuality, every single moment is. While I don't capitalize on all of them, I am thankful I do so a lot more than I did in the past. I know I still have my struggles in the area of sin. I acknowledge that, but glory, humility and love are three areas we should get right if we're to call ourselves believers-- those are three core areas that should reflect our love for the Father!

"Do not exalt yourself in the King's presence." Proverbs 25:6 For me, that's why I'm so adamant about walking in humility, gratitude and love, because I know the King chose me as His son . . . despite knowing all the ways I'd fail Him . . . all the times I'd serve his former minister of music (Satan) . . . and all the times I would chose being an orphan over proudly proclaiming He's my Father-- He CHOSE me!

One of the most incredible, phenomenal truths is the times we are selfish, choosing anything over Him, that should've robbed Him of His glory, in the end, He uses it to only magnify Him MORE! The very things the Devil tries to use to destroy us, embarrass us and ruin our credibility . . . Almighty God turns allllllllllllllllllllllllllllll those failures around and uses them for His glory! My credibility was ruined before I even took my first breath-- I was born with sin-- and I've definitely added to it over the years, but every single bad decision, each wrong turn only means one thing I WAS, am and WILL FOREVER be in need of a Savior!

I have One and that-- that's one of the MANY reasons I give Him glory! You can cast stones at me . . you can crucify me for my sins, of which they're plenty, but it won't change Who is sitting on the throne . . . it won't change His Sovereignty or unconditional, complete and ALL-encompassing LOVE for me!

Glory to God! The King of Kings . . . the Lord of Lords! Glory, glory, GLORY!!

Romans12:3 "And because of God's gracious gift to me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you should."

Psalms 145:1 "I will proclaim your greatness, my God and king; I will thank you forever and ever."

Psalm 105:1 Give praise to the Lord, proclaim his name; make known among the nations what he has done.

Psalm 115:1 Not to us, LORD, not to us but to your name be the glory, because of your love and faithfulness.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Active Faith

Anthony Tolliver did not hit the game-winner vs. the Minnesota Timberwolves last Friday night. In fact, there was no need for a buzzer-beating basket as the Charlotte Bobcats continued their hot streak with a 105-93 victory.

Tolliver (@ATolliver44), in his first year with the Bobcats has been a key contributor and spark off the bench, averaging six points, three rebounds and shooting 40 percent from three-point land in addition to making nine starts in his first year with the team.

While AT didn't have a significant contribution, his actions on this night will perhaps have the most lasting impact. See the defensive juggernaut, who is just as relentless slowing big-time scorers as he is consistent knocking down shots from the perimeter, didn't see a single minute of action against his old team and although many would've been crushed, Tolliver was not only upbeat but he beamed as if he'd scored 25.

"How you doing big guy," Tolliver asked Carver Robinson, 3, a die-hard Bobcats' fan. Normally as introverted as can be, when meeting a stranger, Carver took to the 6-foot-8 product of Creighton. "Good," Carver said as he high-fived his new friend, who was hunched over to do something Tolliver always does-- meet you where you are!

And that's part of what makes Tolliver special. Although he makes six figures and has made it to the pinnacle of his sport the NBA he gets on your level. "He's like the nicest guy in the world. I've met a lot of professional athletes and he is by far one of the most down-to-Earth, just a good dude. He's a great ambassador for Christ," Joey Robinson (@JoeyRobinson), Carver and Caden's Dad, who leads FCA at Tuscola High School, said.

Another Bobcats' fan, who attended the game with Robinson, Damien Luce echoed those sentiments. "Although large in stature, and obviously big in talent, his words and demeanor make him seem as a mere servant of God, willing to do his part in his plan."

That's exactly the way Tolliver views himself-- an ambassador. "Of course I would love to have a huge impact on people! But I know that everyone who is put on this Earth has a specific purpose so if God's purpose for me is to affect five total people then I pray that I'm able to do that."

In an ego-driven sport, and world, Tolliver is the anti-thesis. As humble as he is sincere, any encounter with the gentle giant instantly sets fans at ease. The Kool-Aid smile, one that would make Magic Johnson proud, found on his face that night, and often, was a tangible sign of the joy and peace having Jesus in your heart brings to believers' lives.  He was 1st Thessalonians 5:18 personified, which says, "Give thanks in ALL circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."

"Jesus is the reason for all of my joy! No matter what the circumstances are, good or bad, I always trust that the Lord is with me and He will see me through," the 28-year-old Tolliver said.

The man, who wears No. 43 for the Bobcats, partnered with Lanny Smith (@Lanny_Smith) to make up the brain trust of Active Faith (@Active_Faith), a Christian clothing company. One of the staples, and best sellers, are the rubber wrist bands, which feature the phrase, "In Jesus Name I Play." No matter when you catch Tolliver he always has at least two of them on his wrists so he can, yep you guessed it, give them away.

"That's why I wear them. I want to give as many away as possible. Any time someone asks about them, it becomes their's at that moment. It gets our name (Active Faith) out there, but more importantly it plants seeds," he said.

After every contest, Tolliver, a fan favorite, can be seen handing supporters, young and old alike, the bands he has worn during the game. . . win or loss and when he does it's hard to determine who has a bigger smile on their face-- the fan or Tolliver.

"It's Bigger than Me"

When grammy-award winner and the face of Christian rap Lecrae, a multi-platinum selling artist, was in town for Winter Jam Jan. 5, a Christian concert series that appears in 48 states across the country, Tolliver was in attendance. A friend of the rapper for a few years, Tolliver found himself in an unfamiliar place that night-- a fan.

As Lecrae (@Lecrae), who doesn't view himself a Christian rapper but rather a servant of Christ, blew up the stage, Tolliver rapped right along with him, every single word, with that familiar smile on his face. The night was a special one as the name of Jesus was exalted far above any other agendas . . . whether it be fame, community or entertainment. An enjoyable concert for Tolliver, who had a friend in tow, an evening of fellowship with Lecrae and his band also turned into a personal appearance for Tolliver. Hundreds of fans, mostly excited teenagers, lined the aisle in hopes of getting an autograph or taking a picture.

In typical anti-diva style, Tolliver obliged them all with hugs, handshakes, pictures, signatures and high-fives. Every single person, who approached him, who other 'famous' people might view as annoyances or a damper to their night, walked away satisfied and felt special. For some it was their first encounter meeting an NBA player. After Lecrae's set, Tolliver took time to mingle with Covenant Bible Church's youth group from Lincolnton, N.C. The smile and stories they will tell, along with memories made, of meeting him, like so many other youth groups, make it more than worth it to Tolliver.

"Do you think I wanted to take every single picture," he asked afterward. "No, but for some that might be the only time they ever meet a famous person. And who am I . . . I'm a freaking nobody," Tolliver in self-deprecating fashion said.

"If I can take a few minutes, or take one picture, then I'm more than happy to do it because in the grand scheme of things, basketball won't be here forever. God has given me a tremendous platform and I just want use it for His glory."

"I mean I'm not even a star. I'm not Lebron (James) or Kevin (Durant). I'm just a role player . . . but if they want a picture or my autograph, so be it."

Tolliver is not perfect, but while flawed, as we all are, he has something many don't have-- gratitude. He's just grateful to be in this position, serving the God he loves, alongside the two families he loves . . . his wife Jessica and son Isaiah and the Bobcats.

That gratitude doesn't stem from one place. Is it the grace that has given him eternal life? Is it appreciating life, each and every day, even more after losing his Mom at the age of 56 due to unknown causes? Or maybe his gratitude is so abundant because he has the chance to make a living playing the game he loves? Could it be he is so grateful due to the fact he's carved out a niche in the NBA, but the ride has been anything but smooth evidenced by the fact he's on his sixth different team since 2008? It's all of that.

"God has humbled me throughout my journey in many different ways. Through basketball and through life experiences I have never ever been able to get prideful," he said.

"Gratitude was instilled in me through my Mother from day one. She really taught me to appreciate the small things in life, so now that I'm blessed how I am, it's easy to be grateful for everything."

Tolliver has seen his minutes dip, in recent games, as Charlotte attempts to make the playoffs for just the second time in franchise history. If the Bobcats make the post-season, which they will barring a major collapse, or if they don't . . . one can expect Tolliver to be a contributor. Whether waving a towel from the bench and cheering on his teammates, playing lock-down defense or knocking down a big three, AT will be right there with that same contagious joy and smile.

Sure question marks remain. Will Tolliver, who has a year remaining on his contract, be back with the Bobcats, winners of 7 of their last 11, next year? Will he see his minutes increase and become a key member of the Bobcats' playoff run? Who knows. But one thing's for certain, Tolliver is too busy appreciating the present to worry about what tomorrow may hold.

In short, he clings to the knowledge, and Truth, far too many lose sight of-- there is plenty of reason to cheer every day, no matter what it may hold because Jesus nailed the ultimate game-winner on the cross!

Carver Robinson gets an autograph from Anthony Tolliver while Dad Joey proudly takes in the moment!

That's ME

I am the little girl.
I am the little girl.
I am the little girl.

The words didn't change but they were so oxymoronical, in nature, they were hard to wrap my mind around . . . then a few moments later a tidal wave of Truth washed over me.

The scene was a little four-year-old girl latched on to her Mom's legs at work. Eagerly, impatiently and relentlessly she tried, in vain, to get her Mom's attention. A couple of feet above the little girl's head, her Mom talked to the sales lady with a sense of urgency one would've thought the future of the world depended on it!

The Mom, who no doubt endlessly loves her little girl and equally desires her love, time and attention, had tunnel vision. It wasn't that she loved her daughter any less or that she wanted her to go away, although the message could've easily been construed as that . . . just in that moment someone was more important.

"I am the little girl."

If you're wondering why I was having such a hard time with those words; it's because of the great paradox. God, the Creator of the Universe, was telling me He was a four-year-old little girl. How much more absurd could a statement possibly be? At least at first hearing it.

How you may ask? Just like that little girl how often does God try to get our attention? He desperately wants to spend time with us because He desperately loves us! And true to form we are just like that Mom . . . we simply ignore the little soft voice. Isn't that crazy? The small voice we ignore is the most thunderous powerful voice to ever hit the atmosphere-- that of Almighty God. How foolish are we? We ignore His subtle advances, not only ignore, but avoid them (at times) like the Bubonic Plague.

He will always teach, guide us, speak to us in an effort to stop us from being harmed . . . that's how much He loves us! See, it goes well beyond Him creating us because He desired our company. It even goes beyond the greatest act of Love that has or will ever take place the cross. God, who knew us entirely, completely, lacking no intimate knowledge of how we are intricately pieced together BEFORE the foundations of the Earth were even laid, gives us 1440 minutes and 86,400 seconds in 24 hours every single day to get to know Him. We have UNLIMITED access to the King of Kings and Lord of Lords!

Hear me friends. The Supreme Being of the Universe . . . THE King . . . the One who's omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent . . . not just the Restorer of ALL things but who is Restoration . . . not just the Lover of my soul but who is Love . . . not the Way-Maker but the Way . . . not just the Truth-teller but the Truth . . . not just the Life Giver but LIFE . . . That is Who is affording you the opportunity of getting to know Him . . . What an AWESOME honor and a way past AMAZING privilege!

If all you had to do was show up to the Ferrari dealership to get a brand new Ferrari, I guarantee the showroom and parking lot would be so packed with people you couldn't move! I would be there. Think of your biggest hero, living or dead . . . suppose you could have them on speed dial and they would not only answer the phone but would instantly appear beside you as soon as you called them. Cool huh?

I have GREAT news and bad news, which do you want first? The great news is we don't have to go to the dealership to get something far more valuable than a Ferrari . . . a car would change your life for days, or maybe weeks, but Jesus will CHANGE IT FOREVER! You don't even have to close your eyes . . . He's already there with you each step of the way-- what a reassuring thought! And your hero? Oh yeah, He made them.

Every single moment of every single day we can be in the presence of not just greatness, but the GREATEST! Yet, we so often stand God up and leave Him sitting alone at an intimate table for two . . . that is until we want something then we treat Him like a waiter as we not only place our order but order Him around.  You may say, "But you don't know what I've done, "I'm not good enough or "I don't deserve it!" Guess what? NONE of us do! It's only through His complete love and grace, made available through Jesus dying for our sins, that ANY can have relationship with Him. In short, it's not about our worthiness, it's about the One who gives us our worth!!

If you are going to put in your order, here's a suggestion . . . ask for God's will. While He wants nothing more than to see us happy, and give us our heart's desire, He also isn't going to grant every wish we have because some requests are harmful. He loves us too much to bring those to pass no matter how much faith we have!

Back to the little girl, what if she was trying so hard to get her Mom's attention because a poisonous snake was crawling up her leg? Every single day there is a snake (The Devil-- Genesis 3) that wants nothing more than to bite you and daily the little girl (God) tugs on our legs in an attempt to warn us . . . or better yet He just be wanting to tell us, "I love you!"

"If He who in Himself can lack nothing, chooses to need us, it is because we need to be needed." C.S. Lewis

Is it Too Late for America? God help us!

Not a Rep

Not a Dem

I’m An American.

I Want my Country Back!

 

That was on a bumper sticker I saw the other day. And I thought to myself, “YEP! I agree with that one!” What has happened to our great country? Where are we headed (besides into bankruptcy)? Why are we SO divided? When did our slide downhill begin? Can we turn it around or is the snowball growing too big?

We’ve had many downhill slopes in our country’s history, but we’ve always managed to climb back to the top of the hill...sometimes quickly and other times painfully slow. Whether we will be able to return to the top again, will only be determined in time. However, I don’t believe it will be in my lifetime.

In all our country’s history we have never been more divided as we are presently, except during the devastating period during the Civil War. Listen to the liberal media and the one conservative channel for just one day to see how far apart “the sides” are. As divided as we are, this is just a symptom of our real disease….or downfall.

I truly believe that our last major and possibly fatal fall began on January 22, 1973. That was the day the Supreme Court pushed us off the cliff with its landmark decision, voting 7-2 in favor of abortion. In this case of Roe v. Wade the Supreme Court of our great land declared state laws which banned abortion illegal and unconstitutional. Since this date, over 57 MILLION babies have been murdered. 57 MILLION!!!

Most Pro-Choicers will argue that aborted babies are just blobs of tissue, not really babies. As long as “it” is not a viable fetus, it’s all right. It has been determined that a baby’s heartbeat begins just 18 days after conception. In our society a person is declared legally dead when his heart stops beating. Why are we not declared legally alive when a heart starts beating? Abortion is often used today as simply another means of birth control, frequently paid for with tax dollars.

Isaiah 49:1b (NIV) states, ”Before I was born the Lord called me; from my mother’s womb he has spoken my name.” And in Jeremiah 1:5a we read, “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you. Before you were born, I set you apart.” How many Isaiah’s and Jeremiah’s have we killed? How many Albert Einsteins? How many babies who may have grown up to find a cure for cancer or other advancements in the medical field? 57 MILLION people murdered without a chance to live and love and laugh and give!!! 57 MILLION!!!

After this huge abortion “snowball” was pushed off the cliff, it quickly picked up more snow and momentum with all the changes in society.The sexual revolution along with The Pill had already loosened the “snow” in the 60’s. The Hollywood crowd added more with movies and television programs reflecting sexual promiscuity and homosexuality. The “anything goes as long as it feels good” mantra added more moral decay. Removing discipline from the schools and holding no one responsible for his/her actions continued to pack on more. And it doesn’t look like it’s slowing down with the continuous breakdown of the family and the acceptance of gay marriage as well as legalizing drugs.

There is a war on Christianity going on in this country. God and prayer have already been taken out of our schools. Many are wanting to take God out of our Pledge of Allegiance. These same people want to take Christ out of Christmas and celebrate Winter Solstice, calling it a Winter Holiday.

Our great country was founded on Christian principles and morality although many in the liberal media want to rewrite the history of our founding fathers. Our Constitution was written to protect religious freedom. Thomas Jefferson once wrote, “God who gave us life gave us liberty. And can the liberties of a nation be thought secure when we have removed their only firm basis, a conviction in the minds of the people that these liberties are of the Gift of God.” The Continental Congress approved spending $300,000 (quite a lot of money in 1777) to buy Bibles to be distributed throughout the original colonies. In 1782 the congress not only approved the Holy Bible to be used in all schools but also recommended it. How far have we moved from the principles on which this country was founded!

As stated in Jesus’s words in Matthew 12:25 “Every kingdom divided against itself will not stand.” Does this mean we will agree on everything? Absolutely not! There will always be difference in opinions, but we must unite ourselves in standing up for what is right and just….and killing 57 million babies is not one of them. This must be stopped.

Norma McCorvey whose legal pseudonym was Jane Roe (the Roe in the Roe v. Wade decision) became an active member of the ProLife movement in 1995 and believes abortion should be made illegal. If the same lady who played a part in starting this murderous scheme has seen the truth, how much more should the rest of us. Repealing Roe v. Wade would immediately stop the downward travail of this huge snowball we have created. The trip back up the hill will probably be long and tiresome, but necessary if our country is to survive. What’s it going to take for this to happen? A miracle!

God has blessed America beyond all measure, and all honor and praise belong to Him. God is the answer, the only answer, to our reckless, downhill descent. Without Him, there is no hope, and our snowball will continue growing until it is all-encompassing. Therefore, we must obey 2 Chronicles 7:14, “If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven , and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.” Only then can we once more become The UNITED States of America! 

Florence Beam posted by her proud son John Mark

 

 

That's Outrageous

There I stood with my arm around this feeble elderly woman with glasses.

And I prayed. Paying no attention to the fact I was at work, on the clock, I quietly asked God to bless her. Who is her? My new friend Faye. Some of you may be thinking, "That's outrageous," but is it?

Faye stumbled into the jewelry store, with a cane, a tangible symbol her life had changed forever. I was instantly drawn to her. In her late 70s . . . and one glance at her revealed she had been put through the ringer.

"This is the first day I've been out since my stroke," she candidly shared with me. "I'm embarrassed to be out looking like this."

My heart broke for her. Embarrassed? No. Courageous? That she was, and IS-- more courage in her pinky finger than most of us possess in our entire bodies.

"Nothing to be embarrassed about I assured her." What I should've said was that she's just as beautiful as ever, as His precious and beloved daughter, and that her inward beauty (1st Peter 3:3-4) far overshadowed any way her outward appearance may have been affected by her stroke. I'm sorry I didn't . . . I've since prayed that God would reveal that to her.

I was instantly touched. She wasn't letting the fact she can't quite get around as well as she once could hold her back. I told her how blessed she was that she wasn't fully paralyzed, suffering partial paralysis and did not have any speech impediments or anything of the like. She agreed.

That's where the exciting 15-minute adventure started.

"I am a believer," she proudly said. "And I know it's a miracle! I thank the good Lord every day for that. He has been so good to me."

"I can still walk. I can still talk. I can still do for my husband of 40 years."

Even the hardest of hearts would have been whittled away by her sincerity and words of gratitude. I teared up. I prayed for her for a couple of minutes off to the side of the sales floor as to not draw attention to us, but not hiding our display of faith either.

God was blessed, she was blessed and I . . . I might've felt the most blessed of all. No matter how you slice it, or dice it, my encounter with Faye was truly a treat. Moments where obedience make our Heavenly Father smile, cause someone else to smile and bring a smile to our own faces, I call tri-fold blessings! Often times we are robbed of these special moments for fear of what someone else may think. What will my boss think? What will other customers think? We rationalize-- maybe this isn't the time or the place. If it's laid on your heart-- it's ALWAYS the time and the place!

What's REALLY Outrageous!

We are called, as followers of Jesus Christ, to share His Love . . . so no acts of altruism are outrageous. . . but necessary. Many are bold. Many are inspiring. Many are admirable, but outrageous 99.9% are not. But I will tell you what it is!

The fact God would send His only Son Jesus to die for me knowing all the MANY times, and many ways, I would fail Him during my lifetime. How radical, how amazing, how OUTRAGEOUS is His love for us!?!  Any acts we perform, or rather He performs through us, are simple . . . they are small compared to what He endured for us and lengths He went to to bring us back home.

You see we scoff at how on Earth Peter could deny Him three times when we deny Him FAR more than that each and every day! He saw me addicted to porn, frequenting strip clubs, hopping into bed with women, all the naughty pictures and texts, pursuing all kinds of hedonism and perversion. He saw all the times I wouldn't honor Him and the times I would treat myself with no worth and He died for me ANYWAY! He did it anyway! I don't know about you, but I've used grace as a license to sin more than the reason to be more obedient.

That's why it's easy for me to sing songs of worship, pour out my praise and really belt out lyrics like, "Amazing Love how could it be that You my King would die for me/Amazing Love I know it's true/ It's my joy to honor You and when I belt words out like those, I do so from my soul, deep within my spirit not just from my heart or mind.

How Great Thou Art is more than just a hymn, because you pause and really think about His greatness . . . it is mind-blowing, heart-changing, you are instantly compelled to want to give Him something back! You aren't required to for Him to love you, but I know it is more appreciated than we could ever come to realize.

Jesus found you in the mud and the muck, in the backseat of that car, in that hotel room, in that stranger's bed, in the bed of that spouse (but not your spouse) and He died for you anyway! He pursued you and He loved you too much to leave you there!

God loved us too much to allow us to remain separated from His great love, so He pursued us and gave us a way back to His loving arms through Jesus. Amazing? Hardly . . . that word is terribly insufficient! The fact He STILL loves me . . . the fact He would still views me as His son . . . the fact He delights in my audience . . . the fact He would want ANYTHING to do with me, much less DIE FOR ME~ that's INCONCEIVABLE to my rational mind. Good thing God is so terribly IRRATIONAL!

You may say, "I don't deserve it." You're right-- I don't either, but it's not about our worth rather about the One who is worthy and gives us our worth. It was not bought cheaply, but it comes at no expense, completely free, to us! Receiving something so freely given that NONE of us deserve is GRACE.

And GRACE~ well, that's OUTRAGEOUS!!!