In Awe

Holy God I am humbled, I truly stand in awe of you
I look for the Son when the world tries to hide my view

You never give me a rock when your son asks for bread
So I'm simply asking for Your hand and that I may be led

You raised these dry bones up and then You gave me life
That's why I'll praise You no matter the pain or strife

People want to bring my past up, cast stones and make these allegations
I'm just trying to tell them about You~ the King of Kings and the Lord of Nations

I'm in awe of Your ways and the love You continue to extend
When at times I treat You like an enemy and not my best friend

Lord I give You praise after all look at what You've brought me through
In Christ the old has passed away-- you've made this creature new

Broken all 10 Commandments with my hands or in my mind
So I'm thankful for Your blood how you died for all mankind

Though I know chasing anything other than You is just chasing after the wind
That doesn't stop me from chasing it til my feet are tired then chasing it again

I'm so in awe of You my King; I'm so awed by Your grace
Give me strength to live for You and to always seek Your face.

JMB

Copyright John Mark Brooks Dec. 29, 2012

70 x 7

Now I just laugh! How could I not? It seems like every time I am out to eat lunch I see him.

Who is him? The man who was primarily responsibile for losing my job four years ago and have yet to fully recover from. The first handful of times I would see my former publisher out, I didn't speak. I was not consumed with anger or ill-will toward him, but I was reluctant to speak . . . I had not forgotten much less forgiven.

Yet, time after time, these encounters would continue to happen and one day when the Lord spoke to me and told me to talk to him; this time I listened.  It was awkward, and I did it begrudingly, but nonetheless I spoke. I didn't carry on a conversation with him. It was just a "How are you," and I kept it moving. But when I reached the parking lot to leave, I felt lighter, I felt more freedom and the chip I had carried on my shoulder was no longer there.

To give you a little background information, before I was 30 my career was off on the right foot and ahead of the curve. I had been a sports editor for the county newspaper, the one I grew up reading as a kid, for five years and it seemed like the sky was the limit. Then crash, pow, boom-- with the subtlety of two freight trains crashing into each other-- I was being thanked for the great job I had done and being fired the very next breath.

Talk about tough! So much resentment, so many thoughts of why it happened, so much hurt and frustration. And the timing? Couldn't have been worse . . . right at the beginning of the greatest recession our country has ever seen since the Great Depression. So for two years, with a college education, I searched for a job to no avail. This man had not affected my life, he had come through like a tornado, leaving devastation in its wake.

How Many Times Should I Forgive My Brother or Sister?

"Jesus answered, 'I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.' Matthew 18:22.

When Peter asked if he was to forgive someone who had wronged him seven times; that was Jesus' response. If we're honest though, it doesn't even take multiple offenses for us to throw our hands up and be 'done'/over a relationship. Sometimes just once when someone hurts us badly, betrays us and causes so much destruction, through a choice they make, we no longer want to have anything to do with them.

A perfect example of this was when a young man, through the recklessness of driving crazy, killed himself at the tender age of 16, taking my little step-sister with him. You may say . . . that's different-- it's easy to forgive someone who is no longer alive. Is it? Honestly, it's one of the hardest things I have EVER done. See there are no more birthdays, we didn't get to watch her high school graduation, go to college, get married and have kids. Only tears.

One 'bad' decision, made through the misconception he was invincible since he was a teenager, completely wrecked lives and robbed us of something we will never get back.

But the thing about carrying unforgiveness is-- it continues to rob your joy, continues to wreak havoc on your life and strangles your heart so that you can't extend mercy, grace and love in the way you were purposed and created to do. Carrying grudges attaches you to the hurt and pain where forgiveness RELEASES you from it-- those chains are no longer there! When we refuse to forgive someone, it does not punish the offender as much as it punishes ourselves. It takes away from OUR lives not their's!!

Lewis B. Smedes wrote in his book, Forgive and Forget, "When you release the wrongdoer from the wrong, you cut a malignant tumor out of your inner life. You set a prisoner free, but discover the real prisoner was yourself."

When you think about it . . . isn't that an awesome privilege to be able to set someone free by accepting their plea for pardon through extending the same type of forgiveness the Lord Jesus extends to us on a daily basis!?! And there aren't many more humbling acts than asking for forgiveness when you know you were in the wrong and when you were completely oblivious to the fact, or in some cases the perception, you hurt someone.

Speaking to the young man, through the Spirit, I forgave him. Not because I was supposed to do, or because it was the right thing to do, but because that's what pleases the Lord. It was NECESSARY. Forgiveness changes a period into a coma. The sentence (your life) marches on. Many turn a traumatic experience into an exclamation point and give up on life. An exclamation point on the final sentence and after the final word of their life. That's a lie from Satan himself. Like Tupac said, 'Life goes on.' There is MORE to be written in your book (life)!

Yeah, but I Don't Have to Forgive!

You're right. The choice is yours, but before you make that choice. Here are some wise words on the subject.

"Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you." Colossians 3:13

"Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven." Luke 6:37

and one that will really blow your mind-- Matthew 6:14-16.

"For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."

It's CRYSTAL clear what we are to do when someone hurts us, so why don't we?

An Update

My career still hasn't gotten back 'on track,' and it may not, but I letting God direct my paths (Proverbs 3:5-6). In the meantime, two years ago, I was blessed with a position as a proofreader, which can only help me improve as a writer, hone and increase the talent I've been given and ALL for His glory!

About eight months ago, my hours got reduced (drastically-- from 30 to 12) at work, so it's been very frustrating. Who knows how many tears I've cried over my 'work' situation. Here I am with a college education, intelligent, cooperative with many gifts and talents to match a positive attitude, and I have yet to even get an interview.

But in the meantime, I'm thankful for money I had saved and my Mom/family who have supported me financially, spiritually and emotionally. Several months ago, I started tithing. I will not say what I tithe, but it's more than 15 percent. I don't tithe to get blessed. I tithe because of James 1:7-- EVERYTHING I have has come from God, so I'm just giving back to Him what He gave me and doing so cheerfully.

God promises us He will bless us when we tithe (Malachi 3:10) but anyone who tithes with that being their primary reason for doing so is tithing with the wrong motives. For even if they are blessed, in terms of money, they are missing out on the FULLNESS of God.

So I'm trusting! Yes, I get frustrated at times because I'm human. I cry, doubt, I hurt, I wonder, I get mad . . . all of that, but I KNOW it's not a matter of IF God is faithful-- God is faithful! Like my Dad says, 'The sun don't shine on the same dog all the time.'  My ship will come in and when it does it won't be because I deserve it . . . it'll be because God can, will and does exceedingly more than anything we can dream, ask for or imagine (Ephesians 3:20-- why my blog is named Flight 320).

I ask you to forgive me for any way I have wronged you, from the bottom of my heart, for any small things I've done and the times I've screwed up majorly and I want you to know, if you feel there is any issue between us . . . I FORGIVE YOU!

Life is too short-- live, love, laugh, give (L3G) believe, pray and forgive!

What is Worship?

I stood with arms raised high above my head, eyes closed, a smile on my face as the music escorted me in. I just came to say thank You Lord for all you have given to me: Salvation, my life, my health, my family, my friends, food, a house, clothes, water and so much more. I rode the emotional high as I walked to my car after service when it hit me like a tsunami.

What is worship!?!

Reverence offered to a divine being and the act of expressing that reverence. I agree as I believe one worships out of reverence and love, but to me worship can be summed up in one word--GRATITUDE!

Not to sound corny, but the very fact you're able to read these words should be enough for you to be thankful and even if you have to have these words read to you because you're blind; you're still alive, so rejoice! Think of the billions of people who aren't able to say that, whose earthly journeys have had the curtain pulled on them.

On the Peak

Is it not easy to be grateful and to thank God when you've reached the summit-- the very pinnacle? When the birds are chirping, the sun is out and a harp is being played in the background; it almost comes naturally to express your thanks.

This is reflected through a smile on our faces, going out of our way to help make someone happy through gestures big and small and a certain pep in our steps. The world has more color, the days go faster and it seems as though we don't have a care in the world . . . happy-go-lucky and hunky-dory!

There is something about being on the mountain top that compells us to take a moment to reflect. Think about award shows. How often do rappers, for instance, whose music reflects values on the complete opposite end of the spectrum get up and thank God? I do not doubt their sincerity. My point is when you have success, when you have achieved, when you have reached your goal; even for people who aren't gracious in their daily lives, it's easy for them to take a minute to pause and a take a moment to say thank you.

When all is right and the seas are calm in our lives, I believe it still pleases God for us to worship. . . even if it is easy in prosperous times and contentment. I feel us acknowledging His provision, protection and purpose in and for our lives makes Him happy. Us spending time with Him-- the music, could be in person, on our radios, iPods, computers, CD player, cassette deck or record players, ushers us into the very throneroom of God to spend intimate time with our Maker thus creating a pleasing aroma to His nose.

"Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise! Give thanks to Him; bless His name!" Psalm 100:4.

"Exalt the Lord our God; worship at His footstool! Holy is He!" Psalm 99:5

and Psalm 150, "Praise the Lord! Praise Him in His sanctuary; Praise Him in His mighty heavens! Praise Him for His mighty deeds (His blessings/what He has done); Praise Him for His excellent greatness (worship Him simply for WHO HE IS) . . . Let everything that has breath praise the Lord!

In the Valley

In the valley is it as easy to praise the Lord? When you're sad . . when you're mad . . when you're frustrated . . when you can't see how He is possibly working things out for your good (Romans 8:28, Jer. 29:11). Is it easy? No! There are times, when I take my eyes off Him, and start looking at the storms of life: dreams unrealized, my own 'failures,' adversity I am facing, the unfairness of this life and sin I'm trying to overcome through Him, when the last thing I want to do is tell Him thank You! That's just me being real . . . being honest.

That is when it is a MUST for us to worship Him! I believe, when we worship Him in the hallway before He opens the door . . . when we praise Him in the storm . . . when we praise Him despite our circumstances, nothing pleases Him more. I believe there is no aroma to His nose more pleasing than us showing gratitude, expressing our love and proving our trust than to worship Him anyway, taking our eyes off the bad and putting them on Him. Not asking Him, 'Why are You doing this to me or allowing this to happen,?' but through the lens of love. When we do that, gazing upon His magnificence with our hearts, we will WANT to worship . . . we will feel compelled to!

If we can overcome our doubts, fears, guilt and hurt (feelings and thoughts) and worship (the action) our feelings will fall in line. The hard part is not letting our feelings, in the vitally important battlefield of the mind, derail the action of worshiping and our trust altogether. This is something, while I'm getting better in this area, I struggle with.

But if you have the Chicken Little, 'The sky is falling,' mentality then guess what? The sky will continue to fall! That's what the devil wants.

"Shall we accept good from God and not bad?" Job 2:10

"But I will sing of Your strength; I will sing aloud of Your steadfast love in the morning. For You have been to me a Fortress and a Refuge in the day of my distress." Psalm 59:16.

Wait! That's Worship?!?

Worship is ALL of it-- it's in your T.O.E.S. TRUST when you don't feel like trusting, don't understand what's going on and don't see how it could possibly benefit you, but you still do, OBEDIENCE in doing what God tells you to do (Genesis 12:4), EVICTIONS in terms of what you allow God to throw out of your life (sin, hurt, unforgiveness, anger, habits, addictions) and STEWARDSHIP of the gifts and talents you've been given.

Obeying the Golden Rule, simply being good to people, to-- those who are undeserving, who can offer you nothing in return and to those close to you-- everyone is worship. How we spend our days we're given is worship. What we do with our gifts and talents and who we give the glory to, do we give the glory to God or keep it for ourselves, is worship. When the satisfaction of pleasing the Lord outweighs the desire to please ourselves-- that is worship! Any time we choose selflessnesss over selfishness, humility over pride-- that, too, is worship. Walking in gratitude day in and day out is worship . . . when it spills out of us with every step we take.

"I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is spiritual worship. Do not be comformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, but by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good, and acceptable and perfect." Romans 12:1-2.

So I have one question-- How will YOU worship today?

*Please check out Casting Crowns' song Let My Lifesong Sing to You and Heart of Worship by Michael W. Smith. The words of these songs sum up, in Spirit-breathed wisdom, the essence of worship.